Friday, October 30, 2009

Push through it

I haven't posted anything in awhile, but I have a good excuse. I hurt.

My head hurts. My neck hurts. Both shoulders hurt. One way more than the other, but still both of them. My ribs hurt. Both collarbones hurt. A cough causes my whole upper body to hurt. I just started yawning again after about a month of some weird diaphragm contraction that approximated a yawn. I haven't sneezed in over a month and I dread the day that I start again.

The bad hurt is gone, now it's just a sort of ache that causes general discomfort. Enough to keep me from sleeping a full night and enough to wear me out by mid-afternoon.

What's all this pissing and moaning about? Well, it makes me think of a few things worth remembering.

Some things in life are extremely fun to do and inherently dangerous. That should not stop you from doing them. There are millions of ways to get jacked up or die and if you get hung up on it then you aren't really living. So you prepare yourself as best you can and realize that if you are rock climbing, you will fall at some stage. If you are riding a bike, you will crash. It's never a matter of if, it's when. Remember that and then go have fun anyway.

When things go south and you end up in a bad way (and I mean this generally, not just when you get jacked up) don't sit around and be mopey about it. Pull yourself up by the bootstraps and get yourself back in shape. I promise you that you will not do yourself any good sitting on your ass.

A corollary to the last one: sometimes you need help and you are dumb if you don't take it when it is offered. Just knowing you have the support of friends and family gives a huge mental boost when you are feeling pretty low.

Time goes fast, any healing you have to do will go by quicker than you think it will. Months sounds like a long time, it's really not.

Once you've fallen and gotten back up, dust yourself off and get back on the horse. Remember, it's a 'when' not 'if' that you'll get jacked up, so getting engaged in an activity more physical than knitting means you acknowledge and accept that you will probably get hurt at some stage. Don't be surprised when it happens and don't let it scare you off.

So what should you take from this? "Dad is an idiot and will be riding motorcycles again." Well, yeah, but that's not really it. Life happens in a big unpredictable world, so you can choose to wrap yourself in toilet paper and hide from it or you can go out and live in it.